The problem with my amalgamation of dream characteristics is that... 1. It's never going to happen and 2. It limits me.
I can sit around waiting for this perfect man to walk into my life, which odds are, will never actually happen, OR I can look around and be proactive about finding the perfect FIT.
What do I mean?
Well there's my ideal man, he's perfect, he likes scuba diving, LOVES the ocean, likes sitting at home snuggling, watching copious amounts of movies, eating brownies, eating in general, spoiling me, being spoiled, loves kids, is the most patient man on the planet, loves the way I decorate, has the memory of a God, and can grill like nobodies business.
20 Bucks says this man who looks like Angus Macfadyen/Adam Richman/Gerry Butler, and has all the above qualities, doesn't exist. In fact, if I ever find him, I'll propose on the spot, BUT what does exist are thousands of men who match, can give me all the love and attention I need, without being EXACTLY what I want. In fact I would say, finding someone who meets exactly what I want, would be horrible boring... unless they look exactly like Angus, but the unknown factor that these thousands of men do bring to the table, creates excitement.
Having these ideals, is good, but when you limit yourself to finding future happiness, because you're so blinded by finding perfection, you're not only losing out on the chance to date people who could potentially be your soul mate. You're missing out on the opportunity to find happiness because what you think will make you happy is the only thing you're willing to consider.
For example, my mother, did not want to date Mr. Rose, because he was skinny, awkward, and horribly annoying. He would sit behind her in math class, feet on her seat, and because of his restless leg syndrome, he would shake her silly. She'd turn around and say, "stop, quit, please take your feet off of my desk," and he would do so, forget five minutes later and repeat the whole seat shaking event, much to my mother's chagrin.
One day, Mr. Rose, says, "hey you wanna go out with me..." my mom says, "HELL NO," probably without the cuss word, but still quite as emphatically. 'Why,' she thinks to herself, 'would I want to date the awkward kid that wears a wetsuit to school, because he doesn't want to ruin his clothes while riding his motorcycle.' She goes home, talks to my grandmother about the whole situation, and my grandmother says, "just one date, it's not like you're going to marry the guy, and it'll get him to leave you alone".
Needless to say 40 years later, here I am, the product of a 40 year long marriage and countless happy times.
Now I'm not saying that you should date the creeper staring at you in the corner, licking his lips, but what I am saying is that you shouldn't discredit someone just because they don't match your ideal man, you never know, they could be the Yin to your Yang.
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