Friday, April 29, 2011

But I don't want to flirt with him...

I recently read a book by Ronda Rich called, "What Southern Women Know That Every Woman Should," and while the majority of the book told me was things I already knew, it also put down into writing something my friend Shaina constantly confirms with me. I flirt a lot. Now southerner's typically are horribly astoundingly friendly, it's how we're raised and according to Rich's book 'flirtation is merely a descriptive word for being reeeeeaaaaaaallll nice. We flirt with everyone including other women, children, elderly folks, and of course... men.'

You're probably wondering what this has to do with the title... Well, based on the fact that as a southern woman, I'm technically flirting with everybody, when it comes to flirting with someone who really counts, my encyclopedia of flirting techniques is so well rounded, that my comfort level when in an environment that really counts, such as cute bouncer who has a really full club, is above normal since I've been in situations similar, and I have a plethora of experiences to pull from due to consistent practice. As my softball coach used to say, practice doesn't make perfect, perfect practice makes perfect. Because let's be real, being nice aka 'flirting' with everybody, usually makes the person I'm "flirting" with happy, and that means they're more friendly towards me, which means that my solution will be ameliorated quickly in a positive way, which means my blood pressure stays at a pretty consistent level, and that means that at the end of the day, I'm either drinking something free or getting parking tickets dismissed while also maintaining good heart health.

A lot of people I talk to have a problem with being able to jump from potential to involved. This means that they have difficulty engaging their potential in flirtatious conversation in order to gain a date from the interaction. Now if there's one thing I've noticed from my friends who do have people they're involved with, is that they're highly flirtatious, which means they also have oodles of practice flirtations under their belts.

So here's the point. Flirting is the way to your potentials cell phone contact list, and If you find yourself lacking potentials for future interactions, I have a suggestion. You can take it or leave it, but I have yet to see someone not succeed when using this tactic. FLIRT with everyone. If experience telling this to people gives me any inclinations of how you are feeling with that suggestion, I can tell that you're probably very skeptical. But it's an honest, tried and true method. It'll probably make you horribly uncomfortable for the first few days or so, but if you make a commitment to increasing your friendly interactions with those around you, I can assure you that your dating life will improve.

Now if you're uncomfortable being overtly friendly to the lady at the DMV, o.k. I get it, but try someone more your type. If you can find them. If you can't find your IDEAL, go for the closest thing in the room. Say there's a cute guy at the bar, but he's a little shorter than you would like, make the effort, because you'll 1. be practicing for when someone more your speed does enter the picture, 2. engaging in a conversation with someone new, who might have valuable insight to a new club/restaurant/concert series/etc... and 3. This person whom you never considered for anything more than harmless flirtations, might be someone wonderful.

So there's really no negatives. Because your increased friendliness will be noticed by all around you, which will lead to more positive interactions with everyone, from the cashier at Chickfila to the man at the parking garage, to people in your work environment, who will in turn think of you as a positive, friendly communicative individual around promotion time (just a thought). It will also improve your daily outlook on life. So flirt, people. There's really nothing to lose aside from a few rejections, but even George Clooney has been rejected, so I wouldn't think of it as a bad thing. Just a little life lesson.


Comments? Questions? Interactions?