Wednesday, June 2, 2010

Don't Kill the Bar

I have a problem.

I’m willing to admit it.

I like people in power positions. This includes but is not limited to professors, lawyers, bouncers, and bartenders.

I like when people can help me get things or get into places where I couldn’t go before, but as a good friend of mine keeps telling me, don’t kill the bar.

A lot of people do this, you walk into a bar, flirt with the bartender, get a free drink, and maybe a kiss at the end of the night attached to a phone number. Then you call them. Then you date them or hookup (your preference). Then after a few weeks it ends. Why? Because it had to, and now you can no longer go to your friend Blair’s favorite bar because you screwed the bartender.

Don’t kill the bar.

Don’t kill your grade.

Don’t kill your lawsuit.

A good rule of thumb is to only date someone if you met them outside of a business relationship.

Why? Because at the end of the day your primary relationship with that person is one of pleasure, not one of cold calculating business propositions. Bartenders and bouncers are included in this. You go to bars for a purpose, whatever it might be. You pay them for their service, be it guarding the door or serving you a perfect buttery nipple and at the end of the night, day, week, or year. You will always be that girl(guy) they met at the bar, their bar, their place of work.

I know what you’re thinking, but Laura it will be different with me. I promise. This bouncer really, really likes me. He asked me to have his babies! He promised me the moon, the stars, or a sports car!

I bet he promised that to the girl he met last night, or the one from a week ago. These guys/girls come into contact with more people than you can imagine. As soon as you are out of sight, unless you’re really good in the sack, you are soooo out of mind.

So you need to remember something. You know that bar you like? The one with the cute bartender? The one with the totally awesome DJ and killer specials? As soon as you date and break up with the bartender, you can’t go there until they leave.

And that my friend is killing a bar.

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