Saturday, May 22, 2010

Bi-yas on the End

Like most evenings spent sidled up to a bar, you and your friends walk up and sit down. You order a drink. All of you are having a marvelous time and then suddenly some too-suave-for-their-own-good-player slides up to your group. Infact, they slide up to the person sitting on the end. They interupt your conversation. They're 20 years your senior, and to be perfectly honest their stories about their petty entry-level security clearance become plain annoying.

After 20-30 minutes of harranguing your friends finally pry you out of the player's slimy clutches, but that's 20-30 minutes wasted, where you could have been eyeing up the hottie in the corner.

There's a way we can fix this.

You know those bitchy-basturd friends that we all have? They're the ones who don't take shit and aren't afraid to call someone out for being pathetic or annoying. You stick those people on the end of your group!

It seems simple, but it works.

Here's the same situation as earlier... A group of friends at a bar and the pathetic entry-level security clearance forty-year-old player slides up, trying to rope in some good times and your friend, (let's call the friend Sam) turns to the player and says... "Hon, you're way too old for me and I ain't looking for a sugar daddy/cougar to run around with."

The player approaches again from the other end, he slides up and Toni says "Yo, what you doin'. Can't you see we're talking here?!"

Crisis averted. Your time will never be wasted pulling a friend away from a annoying player at a bar again.

It's as simple as 1, 2, 3.
1. Walk into the bar.
2. Arrange the bitches/ass holes at the far ends of the group.
3. Sit down.

And Done.

1 comment:

  1. If you're a guy and obnoxious enough to make a move like that in the first place, he is probably going to go for the cute one in the middle anyway.

    Then again, there's a direct correlation to attractiveness and bitchiness, so he just might go for the end after all.


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